Coping with Loss After Suicide

Losing a friend, partner, or family member to suicide is a deeply challenging experience that can leave lasting impacts. As a student survivor, you may be navigating overwhelming emotions unlike anything you've faced before. While there's no easy way to navigate grief, understanding what you might go through and accessing helpful resources can be invaluable.

Understanding Grief

Grief following a suicide is intense and overwhelming. It's like falling into a deep hole, but as you navigate through it, your feelings will evolve. No two people experience loss the same way. Some might face physical symptoms like headaches or changes in appetite and sleep patterns. Common emotions include:

• Acknowledging the Loss: Engage in open conversations about the situation, showing your willingness to listen and support.
• Expressing Concern: Let your friend know you're there for them, available to help whenever they need it.
• Reflecting on Emotions: Repeat their feelings back to them to show you're genuinely listening and understanding.
• Being Genuine: Don't hide your feelings. Express your sympathy and care authentically.
• Offering Support: Let them know you're by their side, ready to help in any way they need.
• Asking About Feelings: Create space for your friend to express their emotions.
• Active Listening: Be patient and attentive; it's more about being there than having the perfect words.
• Avoiding Comparisons: Avoid saying you understand exactly how they feel; instead, ask them how they're doing.
• Watching for Warning Signs: Pay attention to any signs of prolonged distress and encourage professional help if needed.
• Supporting Professional Help: Suggest resources like the Counseling and Mental Health Center.

What Makes Suicide Different

Suicide loss differs from other losses, often due to stigma, complex emotions, and the need for understanding.

• Stigma and Isolation: Discussing suicide can be hard due to cultural, religious, or personal reasons. Isolation can intensify; seek a supportive network or professional help.
• Mixed Emotions: Mourning after suicide can involve complicated emotions due to circumstances. Healing may be more intricate.
• Needing to Understand Why: Wanting answers is natural, but some questions may remain unanswered. Seeking professional help is recommended.
• Risk for Survivors: Suicidal thoughts can affect survivors temporarily; seek mental health support if needed.

Coping with Grief

Healing doesn't mean forgetting, but it involves growth and surviving. Ways to cope include:

• Seek Support: Reach out to good listeners—friends, family, professionals. Support provided by the Counseling and Mental Health Center can help.
• Be Patient: Show patience to yourself and others. Healing takes time, and it's okay to set boundaries.
• Stay Present: Embrace each moment and its emotions. Mindfulness techniques and relaxation can be useful.
• Express Yourself: Share your feelings with others or privately, possibly through journaling.
• Have Fun: Engage in social events and pleasant activities.
• Establish Routine: Build structure and routine back into your life.
• Take Care of Yourself: Eat well, exercise, and avoid substances that hinder healing.

Telling Others About Your Loss

Talking about suicide can be challenging due to stigma. Decide what you're comfortable sharing and respond as needed. Remember, healing takes time, and resources are available for both academic and emotional support. If grief persists intensely, seek professional help. Your journey is unique, and healing is possible over time.